I’ve wanted to avoid the whole Duck Dynasty/Phil Robertson is a racist bigot attack, because A. It’s too easy, and B. umm, duh, this is shocking?. But now freedom of speech, Bobby Jindal and Sarah ‘didn’t she die yet?’ Palin have chimed in, so naturally I must as well.
Let’s start at the beginning for our cave dwellers out there. Duck Dynasty is this ‘reality show’ on A&E. I use reality loosely, because as we all know the only reality on TV anymore is on the nightly news. I mean, I was surprised it was shut out for best writing in a comedy series at the Emmy’s last year. Because it’s loosely scripted (read: strategically engineered interactions), and when you watch it it holds the same endearing qualities of Modern Family. You know, breaking the fourth wall: Dear old patriarch Phil dishing his brand of old time euphemisms, the old timer/grandpa type with pithy responses to the everyday, good looking wives and families, and a moral at the end, when they are all together at dinner praying. Just call it the Modern Dukes of Hazzard Family.
I’ve watched it, and I admit, it was pretty funny. Because I saw it for what it was. It’s about as real as Pam Anderson’s tits, and with the same amount of substance.
So GQ, the epitome in men’s style and news, interviews Phil for the upcoming January issue, and low and behold, surprise surprise, middle America trapped in the past ‘Christian’ values are spewed. “…everything is blurred on what’s right and what’s wrong … sin becomes fine.” “Start with homosexual behavior and just morph out from there — bestiality, sleeping around with this woman and that woman and that woman and those men,” are among the observations that rolled off of this Christian’s tongue. There are also some interesting observations about how blacks were singing ‘happily’ under the Jim Crow laws of pre civil rights Southern America, and that Salt Lake city is safer than Chicago at 3 am, but the nail in the proverbial cross comes as he lumps sinners, gays and terrorists in the same group: “We just love ’em, give ’em the good news about Jesus — whether they’re homosexuals, drunks, terrorists. We let God sort ’em out later, you see what I’m saying?” (by the way, thank you GQ for the quotes).
Sooooo… naturally this all gets posted to the net prior to publication, and the next thing you know, A&E takes a stand and suspends Phil from Duck Dynasty like one would a naughty sports figure, which to me reenforces the whole ‘reality’ aspect of the TV show. After all, in real life, if a parent does something bad, you banish them to their room for 10 episodes. Except in this case it resulted in an explosion of support from the conservatives, who as we all know are bitter over the fact that New Mexico just became state number 17 to approve gay marriage. Up first, our favorite oxymoronic asshat, Bobby Jindal. After all, how better to deflect your state’s obvious racism towards you and your Indian (not the native gambling ones, the terrorists) brothers than take it out on the First Amendment and Miley Cyrus?
From Time.com:
“Phil Robertson and his family are great citizens of the State of Louisiana,” Jindal said in a statement. “The politically correct crowd is tolerant of all viewpoints, except those they disagree with. I don’t agree with quite a bit of stuff I read in magazine interviews or see on TV. In fact, come to think of it, I find a good bit of it offensive. But I also acknowledge that this is a free country and everyone is entitled to express their views. In fact, I remember when TV networks believed in the First Amendment. It is a messed up situation when Miley Cyrus gets a laugh, and Phil Robertson gets suspended.”
From the mouth of a genius. And suddenly the First Amendment is under fire.
Uh oh, wait, Sarah Palin needs to chime in about this too:
“Free speech is endangered species; those “intolerants” hatin’ & taking on Duck Dynasty patriarch for voicing personal opinion take on us all.”
Rants of The Misanthrope and other musings 